Women Drivers

This morning on the 101, I looked over to my left and there was a
WOMAN in a brand new Cadillac doing 65 mph with her
face up next to her rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner.

I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was
halfway over in my lane, still working on that makeup.

As a man, I don't scare easily. But she scared me so much;
I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the donut out of my other hand.

In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against
the steering wheel, it knocked my cell phone away from my ear which fell
into the coffee between my legs, splashed, and burned Big Jim and the Twins,
ruined the damn phone, soaked my pants, and disconnected an important call.

Damn women drivers